Oh April, how the ‘F’ did we get here so fast?! Jesus, in less than a month I’ll be turning 27… Twenty-fucking-seven… HOW?! Oh God…
Anyway, I sorry I’ve been so absent. I’ve been feeling so tired and stressed I can’t even find the energy to write. I miss home… I miss my people, my place, my stuff (above everything my piece of crap car that pains me so much not to have here!!), most of all my life. If everyone ever tells you they don’t have quality life in Portugal slap them for me, please – they don’t know what they’re saying. I miss my mum and everything she represents. Yesterday my bf told me I should probably stop being so stubborn and buy a fucking plane ticket home to hit the reset button. Maybe he’s right… In fact, everything is wearing me down nowadays. I do need a break from here, a vacation, civilization, nurturing and a creativity boost. I do… badly. Anyway, while I can’t think about that so devotedly because I have tons of work in my hands and not money enough, I make plans with one of my bff’s on how and where we’re going to spend our next vacation together (please July come quickly!)… It’s always a good thought to fill one’s mind and fight the blues, right? :)

d74b658b90c659250f9cd4cab5d2aebeSo, since when I am down my energy doesn’t cover much more than the essentials, I plug my headphones on and listen to my ever growing 2014 playlist. Hello April & thank you Spotify for making my 8-to-8 workdays more bearable!

#1 - Instant Crush // Daft Punk ft. Julian Casablancas
#2 – Sleep Forever // Portugal. The Man
#3 – Julian // Say Lou Lou
#4 – Quando a Chuva Passar // Ivete Sangalo
#5 – Don’t Wanna Dance // M∅
#6 – Bom dia, Amor (carta de Maria José) // Carminho
#7 – If I Ever Feel Better // Phoenix
#8 – Frivolous Life // Yes You ft. Marcus Azon
#9 – É Preciso Dizer // Silva
#10 – Hearts Like Ours // The Naked And Famous
#11 – Lenço Enxuto // Samuel Úria
#12 – Don’t You (Forget About Me) // Simple Minds
#13 – Quem de Nós Dois // Ana Carolina
#14 – Claire de Lune // Claude Debussy
#15 – Crazy // Kat Dahlia

Schizophrenic much? No way.

——
Ph. via Pinterest.

Endless_Summer-01

// From left to right, top to bottom: 1, 2, 3, 4.

Luanda might be the capital of Angola, but it can be a very dull place to live. Especially if you don’t have a shitload of money to expend everyday (if you do there are plenty of good restaurants to dine at and clubs to discover, as well as boutiques where the plainest pair of shoes rips 200 USD right out your wallet). There isn’t much going on and you have those ‘little’ issues I rarely considered when I was in Portugal, like the lack of security and awful traffic. On the other hand we do live pretty much on the beach (and it seems to be Summer all year long) and there’s plenty of nightlife to enjoy, so yeah there isn’t much available (ohhh, I need an Europe injection so badly…). Anyway, those being basically the options, I find myself short in attire to deal with them. I find almost all my clothes too freakin’ warm to wear most times and I should’ve also brought more bikinis, because well, even though I am the tannest I’ve ever been (Jesus Christ, I was transparent!!), more bikini options would be great to avoid what I might say are unflattering bikini marks, especially on my, well, boobs (since I was never really able in my life to get a proper tan I was never faced with this ‘problem’…).

So I went to look for options and I found these I quite like at Loja dos Bikinis, a portuguese online shop specialized on the matter. I find all four very cute, but I can’t order all of them… Can I? Wouldn’t this break my ‘vow’ to no shopping in 2014 (why the hell did I promised such thing…?!)? Hummm…

I’ve always been a dreamer, ever since I was a child. I dreamed of traveling the world, of meeting amazing people, of having a glamorous and creative life where I am highly successful and fulfilled, etc; and by the end of my days I dreamed of being the coolest grandmother, with plenty of stories to tell my grand kids by the fireplace, on cold winter days. Nowadays, almost at the age of 27, my dreams haven’t changed much. I plan and re-plan, and make lists, I think and re-think, work my options, get mad at myself and then get back to peace – it’s not easy to live inside my head, but I can’t be any other way. So I make list, I set goals, some more realistic than others, but still, I have to have something to look forward to. Living life in any other way is something I can’t even understand.

Last week I stumbled across this blog, and it got me quite inspired, so I started processing the information in the back of my head. Once, I don’t know exactly why, I opened an Excel file and decided to set my goals until I turned 40 (I don’t know exactly why, but apparently my mind can’t make up a life past 40). Needless to say that, for once, everyone made fun of me, and then, that it was an awful idea because one of the things life has taught me so far is that the more we plan, the more things go out of line. And it’s quite hard to deal with the frustration of failure.

With this in mind I decided I wouldn’t be so strict and stubborn with myself, anymore. My insecurities in life stand basically on the feeling of not being good enough, being a failure, so I really can’t feed such feelings in order to keep me out of my misery. Therefore, I’d rather loose myself a bit and give some space to the unexpected to happen. Remember my New Year’s resolution list? Funny enough the only things I’ve accomplished so far seem to be the ones I was pretty positive I would actually fail… So now, as my 27th birthday comes closer, I decided to take Casey’s example and set 30 goals to accomplish by my 30th Birthday:

#1 - Take a Masters Degree in Fashion Communication

Fashion_Comunication

#2 - Find my dream job
#3 - Establish my own company
#4 - Learn French
#5 - Visit Japan
#6 - Learn Italian
#7 - Live in a different language country
#8 - Write a book
#9 - Find a physical activity that I love and commit to

Running_Shoes

#10 - Stop smoking
#11 – Take a ride in a hot air balloon
#12 – Go on a Safari
#13 - Backpack around Europe
#14 –  Take dance lessons
#15 – Read (at least) 50 new books
#16 – Learn more about wine
#17 – Loose my fear of swimming

Swimming_Free

#18 – Take my mum to Paris
#19 – Find and stick to a signature style
#21 – Make a proper personal site / portfolio
#20 - Become a Good Cook
#22 – Learn to shoot
#23 – Visit Italy – north to south!
#24 – Learn to sew properly
#25 – Visit NYC

ny

#26 – Get a Motorcycle Driving Licence
#27 – Go Sky-Diving
#28 – Take a Photography course
#29 - Change someone’s life
#30 – Take piano lessons

So, I have 3 years, 1 month and 2 days to make these happen, starting from now! Some I know exactly how to, others I must say I don’t have a fuckin’ clue, but I’m sure it’ll all work out in time. And since we only commit when we really have something to loose, just as Casey, for any of these I don’t accomplish I’ll donate 50€ to charity. This way not everything is lost even if I don’t make it a 100%.

And you, what are you goals? Do you fear the big 30?
And for those of you who are now past the 3rd decade of life? How was it to get here?

——
All pictures via Pinterest.

RightShoes_Zilian_Popcornstone-01

There are probably very few women in the world who’d say no to a beautiful pair of shoes – remember Carrie (in here, and well, in here)? I am no exception, and as probably most of you girls, I also have way more pairs than I actually need. And yet it always seems like ‘that’ pair is the ‘one’ (just like men), either that identification comes from love or lust. Usually it never is (just like men) but we still hope and we fall (for them and sometimes because of them). But the thing is, the right pair of shoes does make in fact all the difference between a terrific or terrifying ensemble.

Luckily for our hearts – not so luckily for our bank accounts and overloaded closets – we tend to fall far more frequently for the right/wrong pair of shoes than we do for the prince-charming runner ups of our lives. My latest passions in the shoe department are these ZILIAN beauties: the perfect black suede stilletos, essential to any girl, and the red version, to spice up even the preppiest outfit; plus these two pairs of flats I desperatly need since all my sandals and ballerinas are asking for retirement - one with a cool rock’n’roll vibe, the other to slightly revive the tomboy in me.

——
PS: This quote is usually attributed to Marylin Monroe, but some say it’s actually Better Middler’s. Either one, she has a point. Why? Because the right pair of shoes (probably different from one to another) gives a girl a boost of aditional confidence (of course confidence per se doesn’t live in a pair of shoes…), and well, excuse me, but a girl that exudes confidence can conquer anyone.

Last week I decided to start exercising again. I managed to run about 15 minutes – YAY!! – something (I am sorry y’all my fit and athletic peers) I considered a great victory after 3 / 4 months beyond sedentary (and smoking like a stupid chimney). For a moment there I thought I would colapse and throw myself at the bay to put me out of my misery, but I survived. And since I survived I now want more – you know, those freakin’ endorphins can get one quite hooked! So, besides playing 3rd wheel for said runs along with one of my work mates and her prince, I also signed up for kizomba and semba classes. These were supposed to start yesterday, but the power on the building was off and the generator wasn’t working or something – something veeery usual here… – so, after climbing 11 floors of stairs (there was no elevator), I realized all my enthusiasm and effort was worthless (I confess the though of throwing myself down the godamn terrace crossed my mind)… But well, let’s hope things work better on wednesday.

Anyway, the point is, I am now focused again on gymwear. Andy from Style Scrapbook always show of some nice coordinates (and tutorials… I really have to work on my abs), but then I stumbled upon OYSHO’s new gymwear lookbook, and I mean… c’mon! These guys really know how to get a girl craving stuff to look heinous in (although my boyfriend – yes, I found one of those in the meantime, but more on that later – says that men appreciate women’s natural beauty – even if sweaty, smelly and disheveled – much more than the diva look… I kinda find this hard to believe but let him be cute anyway).

So yeah, since I am already having second thoughts on my no shopping policy for 2014 (Good Lord, I am so tired of all the freakin’ stuff 50 kg allowed me to bring!…), as Freddie Mercury so well sang “I want it all, and I want it now”.

oysho_gymwear_ss14-01

Awww, those sheer panels and prints… More here.

b8bbc35ff67f4a3e13650cc8e11e3a29Ph. via Pinterest.

I’ve been a terrible blogger, I know… I am aware of that. I’ve been so overloaded with work that I’m certain I’ve been terrible at pretty much anything besides that. I need a vacation. Badly. I’ve been feeling so stressed, nervous and emotional lately, that to be quite fair, under such conditions my will and power goes mostly to keeping myself sane and not unload my anger and frustration on others. And I miss my people, my friends, my rocks…

Anyway, fortunately, music still works as an antidepressant, mood booster, escape, whatever you want to call it, and even though I haven’t been taking proper advantage of my Spotify Premium subscription lately (you know, so my work mates don’t think I am awfully anti-social and unpolite I avoid spending the day with my headphones on), this is my March playlist (this month coming a bit later than the previous two). Enjoy:

#1 - ‘Enjoy the Ride’, Morcheeba
#2 - ‘Magic’, Coldplay
#3 - ‘Tonight (Best You Ever Had)’, John Legend
#4 - ‘Waiting All Night’, Rudimental ft. Ella Eyre
#5 - ‘Simplethings’, Miguel
#6 - ‘Lying to You’, Keaton Henson
#7 - ‘Holding On for Life’, Broken Bells
#8 - ‘Team’, LORDE
#9 - ‘Bones’, MS MR
#10 - ‘Nunca Me Esqueci de Ti’, Rui Veloso

And now let’s get that Saturday Night Fever ON and happy Sunday!

66b221a70f5b3283ff18b2f50f1a4dd4Ph. via 5 inch and up.

I am not a big big fan of pearls. I mean, I like their concept of elegance and all, but I can’t wear them and still feel like ‘me’. I’d love to be able to sport a pearl necklace like Holly Golightly, believe me, and even though I actually used to play with my mother’s version when I was a kid, somehow today pearls don’t really dazzle me to conversion. Pearl earrings included. I have plenty – bigger, smaller, plain, with a hint of gold or even a pair with a little strass bow that I find very cute – but don’t ever use any (actually I am now in a phase that it feels like the smaller the better, probably because of Yara).

Yet, these DIOR earrings just stole my heart. Sandra displays them here in her own flawless and marvelous way (as always) and even though I’ve already seen then in Hanneli and Garance in a colored version before, these natural colored stole me up a sigh. Of course Sandra’s hair (and overall styling) kinda make them pop out way better, but despite all that, I am definetly adding these to my wishlist.

 

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